Ignore The Bookshelf
In dating and in life, theyre not always what you think they should be.
The list could go on forever.
How did we get here?
Also, theres personal experience, which can cause false correlations.
Is that necessarily true?
No, but sometimes its easier to shut down a romantic prospect than it is to face potential pain.
Hence the identification of a red flag.
I think its easy to make associations with our experiences, right?
(If youre facing the former, i.e.
So what constitutes a real red flag?
We started dating a bit more seriously, and I realized its not just new sheets its everything.
He wouldnt even buy new pillows for his bed without asking his mothers opinion.
And pursue a relationship she did; the two eventually moved in together.
The two eventually broke up, and Diaz points to the mom-behavior as a major reason why.
And, less of a red flag, but still true: His favorite movie wasRed Dawn.
Something about how it shows how all Americans should be prepared for a Communist invasion?
Anyway, turns out he was a gun-nut Libertarian who I dated for three months too long.
He disagreed with both.
My friends still make fun of me about it.
Theyre still together, red flags and all.
Like Bohannon, Alison Herman, 28, spotted a possible red flag early on in her relationship.
My boyfriends room looked like a barren monks cell when we started dating, she says.
Herman brought it up the second time she came over.
I was like,Whats the deal with this, whats going on in here?says Herman.
And, to be fair, he had a very reasonable answer.
He only used his room for sleeping and it helped with his insomnia.
As Ive gotten to know him more, I understand why his room looked the way it did.
Their first date was back in summer 2019, and Herman and her boyfriend are still together.
Had Herman and Bohannon heeded the red flags and stopped in their tracks, their relationships never wouldve happened.
Besides, as she mentions, sometimes the person with the red flag isyou.
I am the person in my relationship whos readInfinite Jest, says Herman.
So, sometimes, I think the red flags are incorrectly gendered.
