14
TheYellowjacketsstar says she was a walking hormone.
Juliette Lewis is terrified to talk about her life at 14.
You’re literally a walking hormone.
Or many hormones, whatever governs interest in boys.
I was just lit up,theYellowjacketsstar tells Bustle.
In her tween years shed been an equestrian, spending afternoons jumping and barrel racing.
Then it was literally like, ok, my boobs are developing.
Bye pony, I don’t care for you anymore.
Hello, surfer guys!
It was like an after-school special.
Puberty wasnt the only change Lewis was grappling with.
One was called Sherman Square and the other was Phases.
Phases was new wave, my first taste of drag queens and queer culture.
It was magical, she recalls.
AtSherman Square, all these one hit wonders in the ’80s [would play].
Sometimes fights would break out in the parking lot, a little bit of danger and stuff like that.
But we would go there to dance.
We were f*cking mean for no reason.
And in hindsight, you’re like, That’s gross, Lewis says of her own teen years.
Even sexuality or viciousness.
They’re only newly formed in your mental agenda and your physical self, so they can be ultra-exaggerated.
Every teen discovers these weapons, but the Yellowjackets are uniquely poised to use them.
Below, Lewis reflects on getting her GED, falling in love with Janis Joplin, and hitchhiking.
Take me back to 1987, when you were 14 and had just started acting professionally.
When did you realize that acting might be the right creative outlet for your active imagination?
You’re living drama in your real life.
And then you learn that you’re able to actually play scenes [as an actor].
it’s possible for you to emote and give all this color to scene work.
With all my roles, I’m always trying to find [the characters humanity].
It’s like, Oh, [Natalies] the toughie.
She’s unemotional, blah, blah, blah.
I’m always trying to unearth that deep concealed humanity in any individual I play.
Youve always had a real love of music.
What were you listening to at 14?
I listened to Depeche Mode, The Cure, Kate Bush.Running Up That Hillwas my eighth grade song.
Then you had theB-girl[side of me].
I was hanging out with a group of break-dancers who would go battle on the weekend.
We’d do little dances like the robot but as the girls, we were just the hanger outers.
Then, still at 14, my dad turned me onto Janis Joplin.
She was on the TV one day.
I said, “No, dad.”
And he said, “That’s the first white woman of soul.”
From the end of 14 into 15, I went all into ’60s and ’70s rock.
Even Miles Davis, because my dad loved him.
How did you balance acting, school, and your social life?
From that point on, I entered the orbit of othered.
Then I would make a run at go back to high school in the Valley.
Oh, that’s that girl from that show.
Was there any part of it that felt cool at the time?
To be noticed by your classmates?
Most definitely not cool.
I mean, none of these were hit shows and it just set me apart as not being regular.
And I already was a weird kid.
[Its] partially true, but it is just kind of a survival mechanism.
Then I got my GED and got out of high school shortly after that.
That was around the time you got emancipated, which got a lot of attention in the press.
Were you surprised by what a big deal people made out of that?
That forever bothered me.
How bohemian or pro-art.
Because I didn’t get emancipated from [them].
I was emancipated with the help of my parents from child labor laws.
It was more of an admin thing.
What were you dressing like at the time?
Ihad an older best friend named Patricia, who’s my best friend to this day.
I’ve known her since I was 9.
She was like, “Yeah, you should wear white Levi’s.”
She literally dressed me in hip-hop garb.
We both pierced our ears with safety pins and wore Reebok high tops.
Then a lot of the shirts were cut.
Patricia was so crafty, we would cut the necks off our shirts and sweatshirts and layer them.
The two of you would hang out with boys together a lot as well, right?
She was the one who would always have guys wrapped around her finger.
I didn’t have that knack.
We f*cking hitchhiked to the beach [one time].
It was very the Valley.
I don’t know who hitchhikes [now], we’re too aware of predators and killers.
But those teen years you sort of make it out by the skin of your teeth.
What would that rebellious, hitchhiking 14-year-old think of your life today?
Particularly that youre still acting?
I was the very definition of a dichotomy in that I was intensely self-assured in who I am creatively.
Or that my voice is my voice and it’s singular.
Then the other part of me was wanting to be a pleaser.
Does a guy like me?
How do I make him like me?
I’m not good enough.
This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.
