Entertainment
TheFifty Shadesauthor taught publishing the power of fandom.
He thought Id had a stroke.
She had transient global amnesia, a temporary loss of memory.
She didnt know who the British prime minister was or anything else about the previous seven years.
By the end of the year,the book had soldbetween 65 million and 70 million copies.
The book, of course, wasFifty Shades of Grey.
So I think my brain went back to before.
But Im frightened about it.
Apparently rigorous sex could bring it on.
She raises an eyebrow.
And getting into very cold water so no cold-water swimming for me and then, stress.
In her 30s, she made regular pilgrimages to a London bookshop with an American romance section.
I had about 800 of these novels, and I just loved them.
I see my books as an escape route into a different world, James says.
I mean, we can all look at ordinary people in the mirror.
Lets read about some gorgeous people.
Honestly, I had such a blast, James says.
When I published a new chapter, it would crash Twitter.
Leonard recalls her devoting every spare hour to writing.
She could barely explain it to them it was as if she had slipped into some alternative virtual dimension.
Working with her was the beginning of me understanding what fandom could look like.
I really enjoy that part of the process.
These are more conventional romance novels thanFifty; the sex is vanilla, but theres plenty of it.
In the second book, Alessia and Maxim are horny newly-weds.
Not too much talking or thought during sex, either, because you could lose the momentum.
Now comes the hard part.
James explains that shes terrified about her approaching publication day.
Its a huge privilege to be able to entertain people.
A privilege, certainly but a double-edged one.
Millions adore her stories, but those who dislike them have been very vocal, and even contemptuous.
Ive never read anything so badly written that got published, he said.
It madeTwilightlook likeWar and Peace.
This made international headlines.
Other critics have labeled her work as antifeminist and problematic.
James doesnt see it like this at all.
Ana upturns Christians life, she argues; Maxim feels helpless in the face of Alessia.
And she has her own lines that she wouldnt cross.
I think Ive become more conscious, as well.
You know, we all grow as writers, and tastes change and you have to adapt.
TheFiftybooks are a product of their time and I love them, and so many other women love them.
Then there were the movies.
I hear James wasnt thrilled with the movie either, I say.
No, she confirms drily.
Ive seen it once.
She still hasnt given her version of events publicly.
I will say something about it one day but I dont want to talk about it now.
Were those nice experiences?
No, they were hard, she says bluntly, and laughs.
Thats all Im going to say about that.
James is now in discussions about a possible movie ofThe Mister.
What would she do differently next time?
She smiles and pauses to choose her words: Id confirm the director was sympathetic to the material.
Some aspects of it were horrific.
Christian doesnt think too much, because theres so much pain underneath, and I think its like that.
But you know, Im not asking for sympathy.
Did her amnesia episode prompt her to make changes perhaps to say no a little more often?
Not really, she says.
I think my resilience has worn very thin.
I cant watch horrendous horror movies, which is weird because I used to quite enjoy those.
I must look surprised that she hasnt taken measures to reduce stress, because she adds, Youre right.
Its weird that I hadnt made that connection.
I think, Its all gonna be fine!
but then it isnt.
I have gone into therapy though, so thats very helpful.
Its about being heard.
She hasnt decided what to publish next.
In the course of our conversation she mentions several unpublished projects, including a finished YA book.
She also has an idea for a fourthFiftybook, but she isnt sure if shell ever write it.
And I dont even know why that is, particularly.
It makes you reflect about where you are and what youre doing.
There are still great comforts to being E. L. James.
Theres also the knowledge that she brought money into publishing.
Her work has created new readers, too, and offered escapism to many.
And Ive had the most extraordinary letters from people saying Youve helped me through my chemotherapy.
Those emails are what really count.
I think of myself as the opposite of courageous but maybe.
Courage is a fantastic word.
She shuts her eyes briefly.
Even saying it is good.
She is in a strong position now, finally.
She has survived it all, and she has stories yet to tell.
