Entertainment

Theres no bond like the one between closeted queer people and the stars who helped them pass.

And theres definitely a picture of me asleep in a D.A.R.E.

Until then, my heart only had room for Hollywood hunks.

And that special bond may just follow them on into adulthood, well after theyve come out.

This crush involved the kind of hyperfixation only a closeted gay boy could come up with.

Moulin Rouge!had just come out and I saw it in the theater three times, he says.

When it came out on DVD, I got it for Christmas.

I watched it every single day after school for probably three months.

Theyd be like, So this person has a crush on you, what do you think?

Im like, Well, shes not really my punch in, he recalls, laughing.

I like red curly hair, milky smooth skin, and an Australian accent.

This is my ideal woman.

The sparkling diamond from the Moulin Rouge, ever heard of her?

Topanga just had her glow-up on the series, so she felt like a passable choice.

So she picked a safe, communal target:the Jonas Brothers.

All my friends were like, Well, everyone has a favorite Jonas Brother, Chrissy says.

I think I ended up going with Kevin because Nick got enough empathy for being diabetic.

It was very short.

They grew out of their obsession by the following year.

I understood that I could safely be attracted to this character, Ema says.

Sometimes the rituals of having a crush bring queer people together before they can even recognize it.

After watching Jonathan Taylor Thomas onHome Improvementand inWild America, she covered her bedroom with posters of him.

My mom still makes fun of me for saying that around the house.

Maybe, Kaitlyn realized, she was looking for a style icon more than a crush.

Its that fine line of, Hes got thisvibe.

Do I want to take some of that?

I remember getting a Starter jacket because Jonathan Taylor Thomas was wearing one inTeen Beat.

Shed get into fights with people who said Knightley and Natalie Portman looked alike.

(Jae concedes now thatthey absolutely do.)

And JaesBend It Like Beckhamfandomeventually turned into a love of womens basketball.

I could kind of code switch how I talked about the crush, Jae says.

And then Id be in my diary writing about how her beauty is never-ending.

Im pretty sure I wrote Mr. My-Dead-Name Knightley at one point.

Yet there was something about the crush that ran deeper than others along similar gender lines.

That wasnt the prescription of what I had to be.