Marriage
In many so-called egalitarian partnerships, both spouses have a go at do it all.
But is there a simpler and less exhausting alternative?
I want a wife, I spat through gritted teeth.
Exceptwifewas the wrong word.
I didnt want a clone of me.
I wanted a false nostalgic robot of a wife.
I wanted June Cleaver.
Betty Draper (without the drama).
I wanted someone to silently cook and clean and care for the children while I focused on work.
I wanted something that really only ever existed on television.
These days, however, that key in of wife actually exists on social media.
Youve probably come across one of these women.
Im served images of these women daily.
And I report on them now on a regular basis on my influencer podcast,Under the Influence.
What those representations of traditional wifehood present is simplicity.
Maybe the reason we are poring over those images is there is a craving for that right now.
That applies for women working in the home and out of the home, saysNeha Ruch.
Ruch worked for 10 years at an ad agency and got an MBA from Stanford.
She doesnt consider herself a #tradwife.
Shes managing her own business from home and she makes her own money.
But she wants to prioritize motherhood at the same time.
Ruch agrees that there is a lot to learn from this new obsession with #tradwives.
What is it telling us about how broken the view of women and motherhood is in all culture?
The roles in a trad marriage are clearly defined.
We live with the unspoken dictum, We both do it all.
I was talking about this the other day withLex Delarosa.
Shes a #tradwife whose content has blown up over the past year.
She smiles devilishly into the camera while baking a cake to celebrate her 24-month-old.
I cant imagine not earning my own money.
I want rules just not the ones the trad wives have.
There are other takeaways, too.
Women enjoy seeing motherhood elevated to a peaceful and dignified place.
The modern view of motherhood deserves beautiful portraits, Ruch says.
Its just another rebranding of the patriarchy, she says.
But on the flip side, it also makes work in the home feel purposeful.
And at the end of the day, purpose is something most of us desperately crave.
you’re free to be an ambitious mother or sourdough maker.
you’re able to be an ambitious homeschooler.
Most importantly, those choices can be appreciated.
They may be toxic, but at least they are models.
The problem is that its hard to package that in a beautiful Instagram post the way trad wives do.
